The Janeite Awards
We hear the call of our Gentle Readers for the Janeite Awards (and Laurel Ann actually suggested the same thing several months ago). We were too busy at the time to consider it, but since everyone is so enthusiastic, let’s figure out how to do it. We want this to be something reader-directed and not so much forced upon you by your Editrix. 
Use this as an open thread–post your ideas!
February 27th, 2008 at 8:34 am
Excellent notion, I can think of a few people I would love to nominate, but what for exactly? And what would be the prize? As a blogger, I would help to advertise the awards, encouraging readers to nominate and vote.
February 27th, 2008 at 9:24 am
I suggest that readers submit categories with 4 nominees. (Some excellent categories have already been suggested in another thread!) Once Our Honored Editrix closes call for categories, she will post them all and open voting. Her loyal assistant, Dorothy, could be charged with tallying votes and keeping results sealed in a tea tin until the awards are announced.
As for prizes, since we’d be voting for characters or actors portraying characters in movies, I would suppose “virtual” awards would suffice. Perhaps statuettes of a “Golden Cluebat”?
February 27th, 2008 at 10:14 am
In which thread could I find the category suggestions?
February 27th, 2008 at 12:06 pm
Feb 25 Complete JA News Roundup - Firthmania Edition
Categories like Best Performance by an Unsupportive Mother Figure, Best Wet Scene, Best Declaration of Love.
February 27th, 2008 at 1:58 pm
I love the Golden Cluebat idea.
February 27th, 2008 at 2:06 pm
Best Cad
Best Brooding Actor
Best Tears
February 27th, 2008 at 2:35 pm
Best Added-on Scene Never Written by Jane Austen (But She’d Probably Like It)
Worst Added-on Scene Never Written by Jane Austen (And She’d Probably Gag)
February 27th, 2008 at 3:57 pm
“Of course. The Volga, which, as you know, starts in -”
“Vladivostok, and ends in -”
“St. Albans.”
“Indeed. Where the coffee beans come from…”
February 27th, 2008 at 4:59 pm
I love the ‘Golden Cluebat’ award idea!!!!!
Dorothy would have to learn not to get confused between the two and to bring forth the right one at the right time - the Golden one for the award winner and the *other* one for - * you know what!!*
February 27th, 2008 at 5:41 pm
Okay, I’m beginning to shape my thinking on how this can go…please keep posting ideas and I’ll keep thinking for another day or so, and then we’ll see where we stand.
February 27th, 2008 at 6:39 pm
I hope there will be a category that David Bamber can win for his Mr. Collins in P&P95. Could he go up against Pug from MP07 for Best Lap Dog?
February 27th, 2008 at 6:45 pm
Most surprising Friend Of Jane?
Best Jane reference in pop culture?
Best article written by/for non-Janeites that doesn’t begin with the words “It is a truth universally acknowledged…”?
February 27th, 2008 at 7:05 pm
“Top Athlete” (nominees might include the vivacious Piper Fanny Price, Anne Elliot and her marathon, and Wickham’s horsemanship, as nominated by Lydia)
“Most Ridiculous Historically Inaccurate Scene in a Movie”
“Best Supporting Male/Female Character,” just to be hackneyed and Oscarish
“Funniest Movie Scene That Was Supposed to be Serious”
“Most Effective Use of Tight Pants in an Austen Adaptation”
“Emo Award” (for whiniest character)
“Best Nude Scene” (Davies has all the nominations here)
“Derek Zoolander Award for the Intolerably Stupid”
“Least Likely to Ever Lose Virginity, Even if Married or Last Person on Earth” (I am nominating Mr. Collins from the book/any adaptation and Caroline Bingley from P&P95)
If I may, I’d like to suggest that we do this in two rounds. First, someone can narrow down the Awards to a definite list. In a separate post, everyone will nominate characters and scenes for the categories. The second step can be the official voting. Perhaps we can even do it in a poll! Fancy!
February 27th, 2008 at 7:15 pm
I definitely like the Golden Cluebat idea. Also, what about an award for “Why TF did they add this scene?”, such as Fanny peeing behind a blanket in the meadow, and then getting her skirt caught in her (bloomers? huh?) so that Jane has to tuck it down. (Miss Austen Regrets)
February 27th, 2008 at 7:49 pm
Most Outstanding Bosoms in an Austen Adaptation
Best and Worst Regency Hair - Male and Female
Stupidest Non-Austen Line Spoken in an Adaptation (I’m voting already for the “goddess divine” bit at the end of P&P 05!)
February 28th, 2008 at 12:54 am
How about “Best YouTube (Homevideo) Parody.” Some of these are more enjoyable than the movies.
February 28th, 2008 at 1:06 am
Best “LOOK” from a male character.
February 28th, 2008 at 7:51 am
Stupidest Kiss (the guppy lunge from the latest Persuasion)
Bother! Someone already posted the award that immediately came to my mind: Best Athletic Performance (Anne’s Bath Marathon).
February 28th, 2008 at 12:18 pm
Outfit I would like most to be in my closet.
Biggest fashion anachronism. (In the scene where Emma fantasizes about Harriet Smith getting married to Mr. Elton, Harriet Smith’s bra strap is showing.)
Best musical theme.
February 28th, 2008 at 12:41 pm
Best Laugh-So-Hard-That-You-Cry-Scene so that I can nominate:
The Color Purple scene in MP 07 when the yarn suddenly throws Edmund into a fit of ecstasy over Fanny
William Price’s little sailor dance
And the blindfold/wedding gift scene at Kellynch
I also think the Bath Run and the Guppy Kiss are so good they may have to be nominated in more than one category, including this one.
February 28th, 2008 at 1:35 pm
Best Performance on the Pianoforte! I think almost every adaptation has at least one scene featuring a young lady playing.
February 28th, 2008 at 2:50 pm
I would like to know Miss MacDonald’s nominations for her categories, even if the categories aren’t chosen. Outstanding suggestions, do tell us. And Maria’s bosom category is excellent too; some of the characters looked like they were wearing the 18th century version of a wonderbra.
February 28th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
How about a nice broad wrap-up category, sort of like “album of the year”? Something like the “You Can NOT Be Serious Award for Complete Idiocy in an Austen Adaptation”? Maybe it can go to the one we all agree really should NOT have been made …
Or, the “Did You Even READ the Cliff Notes? Award for Greatest and Most Meaningless Divergence From the Original.”
February 28th, 2008 at 3:28 pm
Most Pieces of Clothing Removed by the Hero Because He Can’t Get the Heroine out of His Mind
Worst Poorly Written Gillian Anderson Introduction before Masterpiece Theatre (I refuse to call it just Masterpiece)
February 28th, 2008 at 4:14 pm
The most uncharacteristic behaviour of any JA character.
We are often heard saying things like - she/he’d never do such a thing!!!
Some examples;
-Captain Fredrick Wentworth dumping Anne Eliot like a sack of potatoes on to the gig.
- Catherine Morland reading ‘The Monk’.
-Elizabeth Bennet shouting at her family to ‘Leave me alone’ in P&P2005
-Anne’s marathon (this particular aspect of P2007 seems to represent many categories
February 28th, 2008 at 6:04 pm
Most inappropriate appearance of a pig: P&P05 and Persuasion 95 both have nominations I think.
Worst performance on pianoforte
Stupidest thing said in interview
February 28th, 2008 at 7:31 pm
Oo! I love the YouTube award. Really, there could even be several different catagories for those. “Best YouTube Adaptation.” “Best YouTube Parody of an Adaptation.” “Best YouTube Music Video.” “Best YouTube Casting” (I nominate the cast of the Barbie P&P). “Best Cross Fandom Video” (P&P Avatar!).
And we really should have at least a FEW more good awards. Though, of course, the contest for “Best Darcy” would end in a bloodbath, I’m just sure. ;P
February 28th, 2008 at 7:32 pm
My nomination for Best Jane Austen Line Left Out of an Adaptation is Mr. Bennet’s: “If any young men come for Mary or Kitty, send them in, for I am quite at leisure.” Inexplicably left out of P&P95.
I’m afraid that for Best Jane Austen Scenes Left Out of an Adaptation, MP07 would take home all the honors. One wonders what good scenes were left in.
February 28th, 2008 at 9:26 pm
Oh! I like these nominations. I think you should have a Best Dancing Sequence Award. There are some lovely dancing scenes. Of course, you could a have a worst one in this catagory, too, MP07 springs to mind…
February 29th, 2008 at 12:36 am
These are great ideas. I have some of my own. I’ll think about it a bit more over the weekend and try to start organizing it by Sunday. Keep the ideas and nominations coming!
February 29th, 2008 at 10:14 am
Here are some others:
Best costuming
Most anachronistic costumes (or perhaps best mix of costumes from various periods)
Best performance by an actor mainly known as someone else, usually from a hit TV series
Rewrite of a JA line that makes you most likely to shout the original text at the screen (we might have an overabundance of nominations for that category…)
February 29th, 2008 at 10:33 am
I just LOVE this!!!!
Worst continuity/editing error.
And how about some basics like:
Best house/location.
Best musical score.
Best Mr. Darcy, Best Emma, etc.
February 29th, 2008 at 10:44 am
Most Vertiginous Camerawork (I think Persuasion 07 might singlehandedly occupy this category.)
Austen Heroine Most Resembling a Gameboy Character (Again, Anne Elliot in Persuasion 07. In the opening scene I was just itching for a controller so I could move her around Kellynch myself!)
Best Teeth Even-Though-Regency-Dental-Work-Was-Sketchy (Gotta give Billie Piper a nod here.)
Worst Father (We have some good choices in this category!)
February 29th, 2008 at 3:00 pm
What about Most Accomplished Medical Act - nominating Anne Elliot for the relocation of young Master Musgrove’s collarbone?
I’d also like to nominate Miss Catherine Morland for Best Waterproof Regency Mascara.