The Very Secret Diary of Henry Tilney, Part the Second
By request, and because it amuses us much more than it should. Part the First may be found here.
Day 7: Went to Cotillion Ball, danced with Miss M. The troglodyte tried to talk to her. Upon closer inspection, appears to be a werewolf. Definitely need to keep poor girl away from that one. Fortunately she appears to have understood the muslin bit. Still the wittiest.*
Day 8: Realized today that Miss M.’s particular friend is a succubus. Exposed upthrust bosom is dead giveaway. Remember tried to teach warning signs to Bertram at Oxford, but he would have none of it. Wanker.
Day 9: Received note from Sir W— E— in Camden-place. Typical story, hides true identity behind facade of upper-class idiot, blah de blah de blah. Thinks Miss M. may be The One. Lovely girl, but hardly demon warrior–though she DID go out driving with werewolf rather than take country walk with us; and perhaps has chosen succubus as particular friend in order to study method of defeating her. Hmm.
Day 10: Eleanor practicing with numchuks in sitting-room. V. annoying when she shows off fancy ninja training, also frightens the servants. A good sturdy stake is all I’ve ever needed. Maybe a bottle of holy water as backup.
Day 11: Sir W.E. wants me to train Miss M. Beechen Cliff excellent spot. Saw Miss M. at theatre. Pretended to be annoyed with her for skipping walk–worked like a charm, she tumbled Mrs. Allen’s gown while assuring me that she has no regard for werewolf. Definitely understood the muslin bit.
Day 12: Walked at Beechen Cliff with Miss M. and Eleanor. Miss M. likes horrid novels. An excellent beginning.
*Full attribution to Sophie; too brilliant to not use.
February 3rd, 2008 at 4:55 pm
Brilliant. To borrow a phrase from poor, addled Britney “Gimme more.”
February 3rd, 2008 at 6:12 pm
It cost me understand why Sir W. E. had something to do with this. Silly, silly me. The Bath 5k was to dazzling to remember anything else…
February 4th, 2008 at 8:36 am
Nat, I had the same problem..took me way too long to figure it out…*is highly embarassed and very amused*
February 4th, 2008 at 12:42 pm
*shrieks with laughter*
Oh Mags. Thank you so much. My day has just been made better.
February 4th, 2008 at 12:43 pm
…Especially about “that Bertram fellow.” Oh dear. If only he’s listened. ;-D
February 4th, 2008 at 2:21 pm
That was by far the funniest thing I’ver read all day. Please make this a regular feature?
February 4th, 2008 at 3:18 pm
*dies laughing* I esp. loved the nunchuks.
February 5th, 2008 at 2:02 pm
Still ROTFLOLing over Day 8 ! Now see why Jane made Isabella the vamp. And yes, do we have Part the III ?
February 5th, 2008 at 4:32 pm
ROTFLMAO! I’m beyond chuffed that you saw fit to include my small contribution.
I had always thought that Spooks/Austen would be my crack crossover of choice, but I think you may have sold me on Wheedon/Austen.
February 5th, 2008 at 6:03 pm
LMAO day 8.
February 7th, 2008 at 6:25 pm
This? Is beyond hilarious! Brilliant job, Mags. I’ve been waiting for a Henry-and-Catherine-as-vampire-slayers story. I hope another installment is in the works. Giles!