Paging Frank Fontana: the Editrix is in Investigative Journalist mode! Dorothy, fetch the safari jacket that Christiane Amanpour sent us! We need to get in the spirit.
Janeite Martyr Allison (we are always grateful to those who read Bad Austen Paraliterature so we don’t have to) posted a review of the first book in what apparently is a planned quartet by one “Jan Austen,” about which we posted previously. Allison’s delightfully snarky review is worth repeating here in its entirety.
This is the tale of “the scion and the slut,” and, knowing that, you are forewarned. It is the tawdry tale of the rich Mathew [sic]Bennet-Towne, who, while a tiny tot in pre-WWII Monte Carlo, sees his mother kills his father (dad was running away with the governess) and then herself. Things just go downhill from here. Some years later, Mathew falls for Zola, a nymphomaniac circus artiste (by this time I was skimming & trying not to comprehend) and they have a doomed marriage. Zola has an affair with a younger man–Wickham (!)–and Mathew attempts to commit suicide by running his Rolls Royce into a cement truck, but one advantage of great wealth is that Rolls Royces have superior structural integrity so Mathew (at least) will be around for the remaining 3 volumes in this planned 4-volume set.
Even the frequent and sleazy sex scenes could not hold my attention, and I was left completely uninterested in the future fates of Elizabeth & Jane (Mary and Kitty are dropped as characters–lucky them!), though I do confess to a mild curiousity as to whether, and if so, how, Lydia will get herself out of the Turkish prison where she faces execution by firing squad for drug smuggling.
I cannot dis-recommend this book too strongly.
(Good heavens: Dorothy, hide the sporks before the poor girl does herself a harm.)
Well done, Allison; a review in the finest tradition of AustenBlog, and perfectly in accord with our initial suspicion. (Yes, we know we said the other day that the Editrix is a glass-half-full kind of girl, and that is very true, but she’s not exactly Jane Bennet, either.)
Re-reading the original post, we became interested in the author information quoted therein:
‘Better than 1,000 Cosmos and Playboy Advisors.’
–William Wingate, author.
About the Author
Under a different pen name, Jan Austen has written five novels. One became a major Hollywood movie; others were translated into major foreign languages. Austen lives in Monaco.
So who is this William Wingate person, who was so delighted with Ms./Mr. “Austen’s” work, anyway? we wondered. Bringing forth our superior Googling skills (and esoteric knowledge of various Internet databases), we discovered that William Wingate has written five novels, one of which became a major Hollywood movie, and another of which has been translated into a major foreign language. What a coincidence! How fitting that he should blurb “Jan Austen’s” books! (she said in a tone of heavy irony.)
This isn’t the first time we’ve come across Austen paraliterature authors engaging in sockpuppet behavior, either. Our consolation is that the vast majority of that group are grownups and engage in straightforward marketing activities, and we are always happy to assist in getting the word out about their books to those who wish to read them; also that the authors who engage in such immature and foolish behavior don’t write books worth reading, anyway.
The moral of this sordid little story? Don’t mess with the Janeites. We’re way smarter than you, have mad Googling skillz and will be delighted to mock you. It is a small community, and we do talk to each other.